Wednesday, November 30, 2011

MeandMarj: How goes it?

Grandmother: Comment ça va?
Alison: What?
Grandmother: Comment ça va?
Alison: Ah, ça va bien, et vous?
Grandmother: That means, "How goes it?"

Monday, November 28, 2011

MeandMarj: Guest Blogger, Cousin Tory: I just love seeing you be so domestic!

Fans, Friends, and Family:

It is without further ado I introduce our very first Guest Blogger! Yes, its true, Marj's very own sister has a granddaughter (two actually) - lots of women in our family :-) She has graciously shared one of her stories with us:



“I just love seeing you be so domestic”

Hi there, readers and loyal followers of MeandMarj! Alison has agreed to let me, her cousin, Tory, have the pleasure of being a guest blogger on MeandMarj today. I am thrilled to have the honor! 

My sister, Alex, and I were delighted to have a cousin reunion with Alison and her sister, Louise, this weekend. Alex and I stayed at Marj and Alison’s Alexandria pad on Friday evening on our way back from Thanksgiving at my grandparents’ house in Williamsburg, VA.

Before I dive right in, I should put this blog post in context: my grandmother, Priscilla, is Marj’s younger sister. And, as you might expect, my grandmother also has the “feisty gene” that Marj has, which is exemplified by the startling, one-line zingers and hilarious stories that Alison features on her blog. 

My grandmother’s feisty gene emerged at a very young age. When Priscilla was very young—she guessed about five years old—her father’s mother came to visit for awhile. Apparently Priscilla’s grandmother was not a very pleasant woman, and on one particular day, Priscilla’s mother was sitting in the kitchen with her mother-in-law (Priscilla’s grandmother). As my grandmother remembers, her grandmother was critiquing Priscilla’s mother very harshly, telling her that she didn’t know how to keep a house and so on. Well, Priscilla got so angry that she marched into her room, grabbed her toy broom, returned to the kitchen, scolded her grandmother, saying “Don’t talk to my nice mommy like that!” and walloped her grandmother across the shoulder with her broom!

Priscilla (or “Grandmommy”), like Marj, is an old-fashioned lady. She only likes my hair down, scoffs whenever I wear pants (jeans are simply out of the question!) and has on several occasions inquired how my hope chest is coming along. (Apparently a hope chest is a box in which women used to collect their best crocheting and sewing samples to show a potential husband.) Grandmommy has, over the years, gradually accepted that I am no Renaissance woman, and I’m happy to report that she still loves me for me. However, Priscilla definitely still clings to her hope that I will one day become a proper lady like herself.

This weekend, Grandmommy helped me sew elbow patches onto one of my sweaters that had actually developed holes in the elbows. While she was heating up soup on the stove, Grandmommy turned to where I sat sewing in the kitchen, got a little choked up and, in a serious tone, said, “I just love seeing you be so domestic.”

I’ll admit, it was a pretty touching moment. But that is one compliment I would be happy not to receive again!

Sunday, November 27, 2011

MeandMarj: I'm not watching, I'm looking.

Dad: It's painful to watch this game.
Grandmother: Turn it off. I'm not watching it.
Dad: You are watching it right now.
Grandmother: I'm not watching, I'm looking.
Alison: What's the difference between watching or looking?
Grandmother shrugs...

Friday, November 25, 2011

MeandMarj: Speak up or forever...

Grandmother: Does everyone have something to drink?
Everyone: Yes, we do!
Grandmother: Speak now, or forever hold your whatever!

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

MeandMarj: Aw, heck!

Alison: Good morning!
Grandmother: What time is it? What day is it?
Alison: It's Tuesday, 7:10 am.
Grandmother: Tuesday? You have to go to work?
Alison: Yup!
Grandmother: Aw, heck!

MeandMarj: We start with what we start with!

Alison: We need to make our grocery list!
Grandmother: Well, we start with what we start with!

Monday, November 21, 2011

MeandMarj: Louise arrives!

Alison: Grandmother, aren't you excited? Louise will be here Wednesday!
Grandmother: Yes, we can hear all about how she enjoys cutting people open!
Alison: Hahaha, exactly!
Grandmother: You know, it's all because I taught her how to sew.
Alison: Definitely!

MeandMarj: The drive home...

Alison: Grandmother, it took me an hour and 40 minutes to get home tonight!
Grandmother: What!?
Alison: Yes, the traffic was awful.
Grandmother: Isn't there an attractive young man who lives next door who can pick you up and take you to work?
Alison: Better yet, who had a helicopter so we wouldn't have to sit in traffic!

MeandMarj: They need to see how much taller he's grown!

Alison: So exciting! Thanksgiving is only a couple of days away!
Grandmother: Where will Steve sleep?
Alison: He won't be here. He'll be in Pittsburgh.
Grandmother: Oh, that's right, to be with his family.
Alison: Yes, I think they want to see him too!
Grandmother: They want to see how much taller he's grown - The Tall Man!

MeandMarj: This was my house.

Grandmother: See? This was my house. I made this.


Alison: Grandmother! That's impressive! How did you do it? You designed it?
Grandmother: I took a snapshot and then chose the colors and needle pointed it. It was a beautiful house - built in 1818.
Alison: Wow, how about this house?
Grandmother: The house I'm living in?
Alison: Yes, this one.
Grandmother: This is a new house - it was built in the 1960s or so...
Alison: When did you live there?
Grandmother: Oh gosh, we lived there for awhile when your dad first retired from the Navy.
Alison: You mean Grandpa?
Grandmother: Yes, I am trying to figure out, why did we go to Providence, Rhode Island? I used to walk two blocks to the art museum and it was a good art museum. I was a docent there.
Alison: Did you like it?
Grandmother: I enjoyed it. See, this was our neighbor's house - they were alright...not exactly my type. We had these pretty lilacs. My office was right in the window at the top of the stairs in the hallway, looking out onto the street. We had a nice big dining room.
Alison: Sounds fabulous.
Grandmother: It was a pretty house.

Friday, November 18, 2011

MeandMarj: Can you imagine running for 2 hours?

Alison: Tomorrow is my big race! 13.1 miles!
Grandmother: That's crazy!
Alison: Can you imagine running for 2 hours?
Grandmother: Why would I want to?

MeandMarj: We need a new toaster!

Alison: Grandmother, we really need a new toaster!
Grandmother: It's only 25 years old.
Alison: But Grandmother, every time you toast something, you never know if it will be charred or lightly toasted. It's extremely inconsistent!
Grandmother: But it still works!
Alison: But that's its job - to toast things perfectly the first time around. So it isn't working!
Grandmother: Oh well.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

MeandMarj: No oatmeal?

Grandmother: Did you have your breakfast?
Alison: Yes, I did! An English muffin.
Grandmother: No oatmeal?
Alison: Not today.
Grandmother: Why not?
Alison: I decided to spice up my life!
Grandmother chuckles away...

MeandMarj: Your legs are black!

Grandmother: Are you headed to work?
Alison: Yes.
Grandmother: Do you know your legs are black?
Alison: Yes, I'm wearing pantyhose.

Monday, November 7, 2011

MeandMarj: Well, if you want to make any money!

Alison: Well, I guess I should go to work.
Grandmother: Well, if you want to make any money, that's a good idea!

Sunday, November 6, 2011

MeandMarj: Sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite!

Grandmother: Don't stay up too late.
Alison: I won't, I need to get up at 4:40.
Grandmother: Why?
Alison: To go running.
Grandmother: Oh, come on!
Alison: Okay, good night.
Grandmother: Good night! Sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite!

MeandMarj: It's better to be a surprise!

Grandmother: Whatcha doing?
Alison: Checking the weather. Don't you want to see what the weather is going to be?
Grandmother: No, it's better to be a surprise!

Saturday, November 5, 2011

MeandMarj: But, I'm American!

Grandmother: What is this?
Alison: Tomato and mozzarella. It's my favorite!
Grandmother: You really like this?
Alison: Yes, its delicious! It's Italian. We are having an Italian-themed dinner tonight: Caprese salad and pizza!
Grandmother: But I'm American, and I don't like it!

MeandMarj: Well, thats no fun!

Laying in Grandmother's bed, watching the game...

Alison: Are you watching this?
Grandmother: No, but don't you want to?
Alison: Yes, but I can go downstairs and watch it.
Grandmother: Well, that's no fun!

MeandMarj: All right, I'm coming! Shut up!

The phone is ringing and Grandmother is rushing to the kitchen....

Grandmother: All right, I'm coming! Shut up!

MeandMarj: I like it cut in half-cross ways.

Alison: How about a grilled cheese sandwich?
Grandmother: That sounds good.
Alison: Here you go!
Grandmother: I like my sandwiches cut in half-cross ways, too.
Alison: Okay, here you go...how's this?
Grandmother: Perfect. This kitchen has good service.
Alison: Anything else I can get you?
Grandmother: No, this is great.
Alison: How about a glass of milk?
Grandmother: Yes, please.
Alison: How's your lunch?
Grandmother: Perfect!

Thursday, November 3, 2011

MeandMarj: What on earth happened to this?

This note was waiting for me when I got home...I made the bread this morning....



MeandMarj: I thought that's what the morning was for!

Grandmother: Can I go up now?
Alison: But Grandmother, I just got home, won't you sit with me for a little bit?
Grandmother: But it's 10 after 8. It's past my bedtime!
Alison: But Grandmother, this is special time!
Grandmother: I thought that's what the morning was for!

MeandMarj: I don't know what happened to those rolls!

On the phone...
Grandmother: Hello?
Alison: Good Morning! It's Alison, I'm calling from the basement. Want to meet me in the kitchen for breakfast?
Grandmother: I guess so, since I'm already awake.
Alison: Great! See you there!

From the top of the stairs...
Grandmother: Are you down there?
Alison: Yes, I'm on my way up. Did you eat a roll?
Grandmother: I tried to, but I don't know what happened to those rolls!
Alison: Let me try one.
Grandmother: That's the one I was eating!
Alison: But you just said you couldn't eat it. It's alright....
Grandmother: What are you going to do with them?
Alison: Take them to the potluck.
Grandmother: Oh no! You can't do that!
Alison: What can I do with them? Give them to the homeless person on the street?
Grandmother: That would be an insult!
Alison: Well, I'm taking them with me and I'll get rid of them.
Grandmother: What are you going to do? Throw them out of your window along the way?
Alison: Ha! Maybe just that!
Grandmother: I never learned to cook. I just watched the cooks and learned. See, Dora used to take three bunches of the dough and bake the rolls so when they were done, you could pull them apart. These don't look like Dora's rolls!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

MeandMarj: I guess so, I was asleep.

Alison: Good Morning! Did you sleep well?
Grandmother: I guess so, I was asleep. Did you?
Alison: I slept really well, except I woke up at 2:30 and thought it was time to get up! But then, I realized I had 2 more hours so then I slept until 4:40 and got up for my run. We ran across the Wilson bridge.
Grandmother: Oh, that's terrible!
Alison: Why?
Grandmother: It just is!